Tips for Writing an Obituary

Why do obituaries feel so important to us?
They serve as a tribute, a record of someone’s life, and a way to honor their legacy.

What makes a well-written obituary stand out?
It’s personal, engaging, and captures the essence of who the person was.

How have obituaries changed over time?
They’ve become more personal, sometimes humorous, and often reflect modern storytelling styles.

Writing Your Own Obituary

Why would someone want to write their own obituary?
To control their own narrative, reflect on their life, and ease the burden on loved ones.

What are the key elements to include?
Name, birth and death dates, family, accomplishments, personality, and legacy.

How can you infuse your personality into it?
Use humor, personal anecdotes, and words that truly sound like you.

Should you include cause of death or avoid it? It’s personal—some do, some don’t. It depends on family preferences and relevance.

How can writing your own obituary be an act of reflection or empowerment?
It helps you appreciate your life, make intentional choices, and leave a message behind.

Any common mistakes to avoid?
Being too generic, overly long, or focusing only on accomplishments instead of personality.

Writing an Obituary for Someone Else

Where should you start when writing for someone else?
Gather details from family, review old photos, and focus on what made them unique.

How do you balance facts with storytelling?
List the essentials, but also include stories that bring them to life.

What should you leave out?
Sensitive topics, family conflicts, or anything they wouldn’t want public.

How do you capture their personality authentically? Use their favorite sayings, quirks, and what made them special

How can you make an obituary meaningful for those grieving? Focus on their impact and how they’ll be remembered.

What if you have limited information about the person? Keep it simple, focus on their kindness or contributions, and ask others for input.

Tips for handling tricky family dynamics when writing an obituary?
Keep it neutral, focus on the deceased, and get family consensus when possible.

Modern Obituary Trends & Creative Ideas

The rise of humorous or unconventional obituaries—good idea or risky?
It depends on the person—if humor was part of their life, it can be a great touch.

Video obituaries and social media memorials—are they the future?
Yes, they allow for deeper storytelling and wider sharing.

How to write an obituary for someone with a complicated or difficult past?
Be honest but kind—focus on growth, lessons, or their best qualities.

What about pet obituaries?
Absolutely! Pets are family, and their lives deserve recognition too.

Obituaries aren’t just about death—they’re about life and how we choose to remember it.

Start with a simple draft—who you are, what you love, and how you’d like to be remembered.

Sheila Burke

By Sheila Burke

Sheila Burke is an End-of-Life Doula and Founder of the Being Better Humans online community. A published author, Sheila's most recent book, Bullshit To Butterflies, is a memoir about her husband Shane's journey with cancer.

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